Days in the Life of a Pattaya Hotel Owner

We did actually stumble across one development where there was some originality in the design and my interest was sufficiently aroused for a closer inspection to be undertaken. The feature room was a wonderful conservatory style family area with a domed glass ceiling giving a feeling of spaciousness and light throughout. The kitchen was also a good size, certainly large enough for a dining table, and the living room was vast. We ventured upstairs, almost excited, where we were shown two large double bedrooms, both with an en-suite bathroom, and a grand ‘master bedroom’ with a deluxe en-suite bathroom. There was a fourth bedroom, very spacious, featuring a range of glass sliding doors onto a balcony. It was, alas, at this point everything began to fall apart as I tried to get my head around the upstairs layout, it just did not seem right. I scurried from room to room and took mental pictures and scribbled notes and then went to speak with the chap who was showing the property to us.

“I think there are a few design flaws here, can I discuss them with you please?”

“Design is very good. You like the floors yes?” he replied

“No not floors, flaws. I mean problems”

“Oh no, no problem with floors, floors very good”

Here Jin jumped in and quickly translated what I was trying to say. I continued with Jin now as interpreter. “We need four bedrooms as we have three children so in that regard this house fits the bill. However, the large room with the balcony does not have an en-suite bathroom and given its shape I do not see how one could be installed. This would mean whoever was in that room would either have to go downstairs to use the bathroom or go into another person’s bedroom”

“No bathroom, correct, no problem, go downstairs. Anyway this not bedroom but library”

“What?”

“This is library”

I decided I was not going to get into a pointless discussion as to why anyone would build a house with a nice large room accessing the only balcony as a library. How many people can there be looking for a three bedroom; three bathroom; living room; kitchen plus library property? Not that many would be my guess!

“OK library it is then. The next problem is that of the arrangement of the windows in the master bedroom. The only sensible location for the bed and the shape of the walls in this room mean there is absolutely nowhere to construct anything other than a single wardrobe without cutting across at least one window”

“Put wardrobe in library”

“No.” Another pointless discussion killed at birth I pressed on “Next on my list are the en-suite bathrooms in the two other bedrooms. The doors will not fully open as they open against the wash hand basins. You also have to walk over the W.C. in order to get to the bath. The floor space for these rooms is sufficient but they need to be re-designed and the sanitary fittings re-sited.”

“Why?”

“I have just explained WHY”

“When”

“No, stop, now. Let me just say that as far as I am concerned the downstairs of the house is wonderful but the upstairs simply does not work. I really think it needs to be re-configured. I suggest that you speak with your architect and ask him to do some new plans as the upper floor simply does not work.”

“I am architect, I work”

“Oh!”

We left.