Comments on: Realizing the End of My Marriage in Thailand http://www.riffraffles.com/2008/08/19/realizing-the-end-of-my-marriage-in-thailand/ A continuation of the book Riff-Raffles, by Kevin Meacher Thu, 09 Sep 2010 04:04:58 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.6.1 By: Kevin Meacher http://www.riffraffles.com/2008/08/19/realizing-the-end-of-my-marriage-in-thailand/#comment-419 Kevin Meacher Thu, 23 Oct 2008 04:48:45 +0000 http://www.riffraffles.com/2008/08/19/realizing-the-end-of-my-marriage-in-thailand/#comment-419 Dear 'Rose', I though it may be worth adding a short additional reply to your recent comments concerning you having three children to look after and B10,000,000 is loans/mortgages to service. Firstly you omitted to mention that you are presently enjoying all of the income from the hotel; living in the family house and generally controlling our assets worth in the region of B60,000,000. You should then think back to when we met in December 2000 when you had two children to care for and not even B500 to your name! You have climbed up the ladder of success on the back of what I achieved in the U.K and through the incresed value in the properties and land we have purchased here. I have offered you a settlement that sees us both get 50% of the assets and you have declined this so what else can I do except fight for my rights through the courts? Kevin Dear ‘Rose’,

I though it may be worth adding a short additional reply to your recent comments concerning you having three children to look after and B10,000,000 is loans/mortgages to service.

Firstly you omitted to mention that you are presently enjoying all of the income from the hotel; living in the family house and generally controlling our assets worth in the region of B60,000,000.
You should then think back to when we met in December 2000 when you had two children to care for and not even B500 to your name!

You have climbed up the ladder of success on the back of what I achieved in the U.K and through the incresed value in the properties and land we have purchased here. I have offered you a settlement that sees us both get 50% of the assets and you have declined this so what else can I do except fight for my rights through the courts?

Kevin

]]> By: Kevin Meacher http://www.riffraffles.com/2008/08/19/realizing-the-end-of-my-marriage-in-thailand/#comment-416 Kevin Meacher Wed, 22 Oct 2008 04:18:26 +0000 http://www.riffraffles.com/2008/08/19/realizing-the-end-of-my-marriage-in-thailand/#comment-416 Dear 'Rose', I keep trying to tell you to listen! Your constant shouting and screaming achieves nothing except an ever deepening problem. You even disconnected my phone becuase it was registered in your name although I paid the bills! You are being spiteful and but hurting yourself more than anyone else. All I want is for you to calm down, sit around a table with your lawyer and my lawyer and reach an agreement that will work for both of us and, hopefully, start to bring an end to your obvious pain. Dear ‘Rose’,

I keep trying to tell you to listen! Your constant shouting and screaming achieves nothing except an ever deepening problem. You even disconnected my phone becuase it was registered in your name although I paid the bills!

You are being spiteful and but hurting yourself more than anyone else.

All I want is for you to calm down, sit around a table with your lawyer and my lawyer and reach an agreement that will work for both of us and, hopefully, start to bring an end to your obvious pain.

]]> By: ROSE http://www.riffraffles.com/2008/08/19/realizing-the-end-of-my-marriage-in-thailand/#comment-414 ROSE Tue, 21 Oct 2008 16:51:13 +0000 http://www.riffraffles.com/2008/08/19/realizing-the-end-of-my-marriage-in-thailand/#comment-414 NOT ONLY YOU WRIT SYORY LIE BUT MOW YOU ALLSO TOLD LIE TO EVERY ONE YOU STAY WITH SOMBODY WALK AWAY ME AND 10 BILLIN BAHT 1GILL 2 BOYS WITH ME WHO I HAVE TO TAKE CARE WHAT YOU WANT??? LOOK YOUR HERE . YOUR BRAND YOU SALF OK???? GOOD BUY NOT ONLY YOU WRIT SYORY LIE BUT MOW YOU ALLSO TOLD LIE TO EVERY ONE
YOU STAY WITH SOMBODY WALK AWAY ME AND 10 BILLIN BAHT 1GILL 2 BOYS WITH ME WHO I HAVE TO TAKE CARE WHAT YOU WANT???
LOOK YOUR HERE . YOUR BRAND YOU SALF OK????
GOOD BUY

]]> By: Kevin Meacher http://www.riffraffles.com/2008/08/19/realizing-the-end-of-my-marriage-in-thailand/#comment-399 Kevin Meacher Sat, 18 Oct 2008 18:37:41 +0000 http://www.riffraffles.com/2008/08/19/realizing-the-end-of-my-marriage-in-thailand/#comment-399 Dear Melvin, Your reply and all of your comments are welcomed as are those of anyone. I do not have all of the answers, I know that and I also that I am not the brightest star in the sky. My kids are deliberately kept on the periphery of my writing as they are too young to fend for themselves or defend anything I may say that gets thrown at them. I accept though that our divorce is now there in the public domain but my writings will only ever barely touch on them ot their lives. I know you mean well but you really have to endure what I have been through to fully understand things. I have tried for two years to balance my relationship and over the last six months given everything to endeavour to reach anamicable solution. Mrs. Boss still shouts and screams of me now the way she did all those months ago - how long does one wait for a womans scorn to be pacified? I want the divorce sorted out as soon as possible for everyone's sake, including my own. It, however, appears though that this will go to court and then possibly appeal after appeal (if Mrs. Boss is to be believed). My step-son and daughter have both told me what they think and made it clear, that whilst they still love me, they believe it is their duty to stand by their mother - I have told them that is quite correct and I applaud their loyalty. Young James, on the other hand, is six but with the ability to often think like, or better, than most adults, myself included. I will simply end this reply wih James's quote of the day last weekend: "Daddy, mummy says many things to stop me loving you but you are my Dad and I am not nor do I want to ever stop loving you." Dear Melvin,

Your reply and all of your comments are welcomed as are those of anyone. I do not have all of the answers, I know that and I also that I am not the brightest star in the sky. My kids are deliberately kept on the periphery of my writing as they are too young to fend for themselves or defend anything I may say that gets thrown at them. I accept though that our divorce is now there in the public domain but my writings will only ever barely touch on them ot their lives.

I know you mean well but you really have to endure what I have been through to fully understand things. I have tried for two years to balance my relationship and over the last six months given everything to endeavour to reach anamicable solution. Mrs. Boss still shouts and screams of me now the way she did all those months ago - how long does one wait for a womans scorn to be pacified?

I want the divorce sorted out as soon as possible for everyone’s sake, including my own. It, however, appears though that this will go to court and then possibly appeal after appeal (if Mrs. Boss is to be believed).

My step-son and daughter have both told me what they think and made it clear, that whilst they still love me, they believe it is their duty to stand by their mother - I have told them that is quite correct and I applaud their loyalty. Young James, on the other hand, is six but with the ability to often think like, or better, than most adults, myself included. I will simply end this reply wih James’s quote of the day last weekend: “Daddy, mummy says many things to stop me loving you but you are my Dad and I am not nor do I want to ever stop loving you.”

]]> By: Melvin http://www.riffraffles.com/2008/08/19/realizing-the-end-of-my-marriage-in-thailand/#comment-398 Melvin Sat, 18 Oct 2008 14:51:17 +0000 http://www.riffraffles.com/2008/08/19/realizing-the-end-of-my-marriage-in-thailand/#comment-398 Dear Kevin - thank you for your reply I hope you appreciate that I am only an observer in this matter and seeing that you have made it public allows me and anybody else the temptation to comment as I am sure there are many out there including myself who have also suffered under that illusion of marriage. Perhaps you have hung your dirty washing out so we can all see the otherside of what could otherwise appears to be the idyllic lifestyle you were trying to find in the first place. I cannot help think that you yourself in retrospect must be thinking what an idiot I have been to trust in a completely different system and culture. Having read the last few accounts of the continuing story of you troubles with your wife I still can't help thinking about your child(ren) as you have rarely made reference to them. The priority seems to be on material matters and money. I appreciate that you might be borasic but this is not the fault of your children, where do they come into the picture of things, and what enjoyment have you had with them since you left. We the general public and maybe I am the only one are worried about your relationship with them, especially when in your book you write about your own family problems and what appears to be a total lack of parental support ( this is not meant to offend as you did only give a skeletal outline of your upbringing and I am trying to read between the lines ) is this going to happen to them as life does have a weird way of repeating itself. From your book you do speak very highly of your children as you do (did) of your wife also, but now its only critisism of your present situation. My advice to you is to lay off things until such a moment when things have calmed down, time heals and then maybe all parties will be more forgiving. Spend as much time with your children and care for their welfare and they will grow to understand and even support the situation which could be in your favour. Most women in this world respect a man for fullfilling his paternal role, and the children do especially, it will be the best investment you could ever make. If your wife can also achieve this then I think you can sit down and come to a healthier solution but maybe you should be just a little more patient and lay off the legal vendetta - its still early days - what have you got to lose, if you have your paperwork in order they aren't going to disappear. May you God be with you Melvin Dear Kevin - thank you for your reply
I hope you appreciate that I am only an observer in this matter and seeing that you have made it public allows me and anybody else the temptation to comment as I am sure there are many out there including myself who have also suffered under that illusion of marriage. Perhaps you have hung your dirty washing out so we can all see the otherside of what could otherwise appears to be the idyllic lifestyle you were trying to find in the first place. I cannot help think that you yourself in retrospect must be thinking what an idiot I have been to trust in a completely different system and culture. Having read the last few accounts of the continuing story of you troubles with your wife I still can’t help thinking about your child(ren) as you have rarely made reference to them. The priority seems to be on material matters and money. I appreciate that you might be borasic but this is not the fault of your children, where do they come into the picture of things, and what enjoyment have you had with them since you left. We the general public and maybe I am the only one are worried about your relationship with them, especially when in your book you write about your own family problems and what appears to be a total lack of parental support ( this is not meant to offend as you did only give a skeletal outline of your upbringing and I am trying to read between the lines ) is this going to happen to them as life does have a weird way of repeating itself. From your book you do speak very highly of your children as you do (did) of your wife also, but now its only critisism of your present situation.

My advice to you is to lay off things until such a moment when things have calmed down, time heals and then maybe all parties will be more forgiving. Spend as much time with your children and care for their welfare and they will grow to understand and even support the situation which could be in your favour. Most women in this world respect a man for fullfilling his paternal role, and the children do especially, it will be the best investment you could ever make.

If your wife can also achieve this then I think you can sit down and come to a healthier solution but maybe you should be just a little more patient and lay off the legal vendetta - its still early days - what have you got to lose, if you have your paperwork in order they aren’t going to disappear.

May you God be with you

Melvin

]]> By: Kevin Meacher http://www.riffraffles.com/2008/08/19/realizing-the-end-of-my-marriage-in-thailand/#comment-397 Kevin Meacher Sat, 18 Oct 2008 03:55:23 +0000 http://www.riffraffles.com/2008/08/19/realizing-the-end-of-my-marriage-in-thailand/#comment-397 Dear Melvin, I do appreciate your comments and agree with what you say. However, this is my Blog and not a forum for having an open discussion with my wife by my own choosing. If she wishes to write on here then that is fine but my responses will be those I feel are synonymous with the Blog itself. Believe me I have had more conversations than I care to recall with Mrs. Boss that have borne no fruit whatsoever and I am never listened to - whether I use words with one or ten syllables! I tried for well over two years to find some common ground but reached the point where I no longer had the energy or the inclination to try anymore. It was a very difficult time, possibly the most painful I have experienced and I felt alone, isolated and, to a large degree, trapped. The moment I started to break the chains that bound me I started to rediscover myself and my own sense of worth. The next twelve months will not be easy and the result of the divorce at the end of that time may prove to be a disaster for me financially. However, life is about being content with oneself, about enjoying the time we have on this earth. If I have no money then I just have to go and make some....again! As I have said here before I wish my wife no harm and hope that at some stage (soon!) she will be able to let the anger go and move forward to a happier place herself. Best Regards, Kevin Dear Melvin,

I do appreciate your comments and agree with what you say. However, this is my Blog and not a forum for having an open discussion with my wife by my own choosing. If she wishes to write on here then that is fine but my responses will be those I feel are synonymous with the Blog itself.

Believe me I have had more conversations than I care to recall with Mrs. Boss that have borne no fruit whatsoever and I am never listened to - whether I use words with one or ten syllables! I tried for well over two years to find some common ground but reached the point where I no longer had the energy or the inclination to try anymore. It was a very difficult time, possibly the most painful I have experienced and I felt alone, isolated and, to a large degree, trapped. The moment I started to break the chains that bound me I started to rediscover myself and my own sense of worth.

The next twelve months will not be easy and the result of the divorce at the end of that time may prove to be a disaster for me financially. However, life is about being content with oneself, about enjoying the time we have on this earth. If I have no money then I just have to go and make some….again!

As I have said here before I wish my wife no harm and hope that at some stage (soon!) she will be able to let the anger go and move forward to a happier place herself.

Best Regards,
Kevin

]]> By: melvin http://www.riffraffles.com/2008/08/19/realizing-the-end-of-my-marriage-in-thailand/#comment-396 melvin Thu, 16 Oct 2008 22:45:48 +0000 http://www.riffraffles.com/2008/08/19/realizing-the-end-of-my-marriage-in-thailand/#comment-396 Dear Kevin I hope you are settling in to your new life. I have been keeping up with the developments of inevitable break from Jin, Mrs Boss alias Rose and realise that you have both become tabloid celebreties, second to the current no.1 candidates Madonna and Guy Ritchie although somehow I find your story more interesting. What I do notice is that when your wife writes to you it is at first difficult to understand her writing style, she stuggles to express herself in English whereas you reply to her as if she can understand your flamboyant style. Maybe if you wrote in a more simplified manner you would possibly begin to communicate with each other - is this why maybe you both have problems. I remember my father who is quite an intelectual, saying to me when I was a young boy not to complicate things by trying to be clever with language. I realise now that he is right, being understood is one of the great achievments in ones life especially when the person(s) you are intimate with matter. For you to write English to her and not Thai is obviously simple but how would it be if you were to answer her in Thai and for her to write to you in her mother tongue, would you understand? Regards Melvin Dear Kevin
I hope you are settling in to your new life. I have been keeping up with the developments of inevitable break from Jin, Mrs Boss alias Rose and realise that you have both become tabloid celebreties, second to the current no.1 candidates Madonna and Guy Ritchie although somehow I find your story more interesting.
What I do notice is that when your wife writes to you it is at first difficult to understand her writing style, she stuggles to express herself in English whereas you reply to her as if she can understand your flamboyant style. Maybe if you wrote in a more simplified manner you would possibly begin to communicate with each other - is this why maybe you both have problems. I remember my father who is quite an intelectual, saying to me when I was a young boy not to complicate things by trying to be clever with language. I realise now that he is right, being understood is one of the great achievments in ones life especially when the person(s) you are intimate with matter. For you to write English to her and not Thai is obviously simple but how would it be if you were to answer her in Thai and for her to write to you in her mother tongue, would you understand?

Regards Melvin

]]> By: Kevin Meacher http://www.riffraffles.com/2008/08/19/realizing-the-end-of-my-marriage-in-thailand/#comment-394 Kevin Meacher Tue, 14 Oct 2008 11:13:33 +0000 http://www.riffraffles.com/2008/08/19/realizing-the-end-of-my-marriage-in-thailand/#comment-394 Dear Rose, Thank you for your recent pictures. Unfortunately though I will not be posting them as the 'Spot the Katoey' competition finished last year!! Dear Rose,

Thank you for your recent pictures. Unfortunately though I will not be posting them as the ‘Spot the Katoey’ competition finished last year!!

]]> By: ROSE http://www.riffraffles.com/2008/08/19/realizing-the-end-of-my-marriage-in-thailand/#comment-391 ROSE Mon, 13 Oct 2008 12:25:51 +0000 http://www.riffraffles.com/2008/08/19/realizing-the-end-of-my-marriage-in-thailand/#comment-391 HI!!1 KEVEN YOU HAVE SO HAMSOMMAN THANK TO WRITE BACK YOU MUCH SAY THANK TO ME TO HOLP YOU TO PROMOUT YOUR BOOK!!!! WOW!!! I AM SO SAD I CAN NOT WORK WITH OUT YOU SO SAD NOT HAPPY LIFE SAD SAD SAD!!!I AM SO BED LOOKING NO BODY WANT I HOLP YOU TO HAVE GOOGLIFE YOU TO HANSOMMAN GOOD LOOKING EVERY BODY WILL WANT YOU TO BE WITH HOW ABOUT YOU HAIR IT GROW UP SAME YOUR BREND??? OR NOTI WILL SENT YOU MY PHOTO YOU CAN SHOW TO SANE BODY WHO WANT TO NKOW ABOUT ME THANK HI!!1 KEVEN YOU HAVE SO HAMSOMMAN THANK TO WRITE BACK YOU MUCH SAY THANK TO ME TO HOLP YOU TO PROMOUT YOUR BOOK!!!!
WOW!!! I AM SO SAD I CAN NOT WORK WITH OUT YOU SO SAD NOT HAPPY LIFE SAD SAD SAD!!!I AM SO BED LOOKING NO BODY WANT
I HOLP YOU TO HAVE GOOGLIFE YOU TO HANSOMMAN GOOD LOOKING EVERY BODY WILL WANT YOU TO BE WITH HOW ABOUT YOU HAIR IT GROW UP SAME YOUR BREND???
OR NOTI WILL SENT YOU MY PHOTO YOU CAN SHOW TO SANE BODY WHO WANT TO NKOW ABOUT ME
THANK

]]> By: Kevin Meacher http://www.riffraffles.com/2008/08/19/realizing-the-end-of-my-marriage-in-thailand/#comment-390 Kevin Meacher Mon, 13 Oct 2008 01:35:46 +0000 http://www.riffraffles.com/2008/08/19/realizing-the-end-of-my-marriage-in-thailand/#comment-390 Dear Jin alias Mrs. Boss alias Rose, I could, of course, have your comments delted, however, I choose not to. It is a free world, in the main, and everyone should have the chance to speak. If you want to know why I left you then (a) you should have listened on the thousands of occassions I endeavoured to talk with you and (b) should know that you carry a heavy burden through your actions on what has transpired in our marriage. I believe, and others will tell you better than I, that all through my writings I have endeavoured to portray you as an honest, hard working yet feisty person. I am not so insecure as to think the breakdown of our relationship is all your fault and as I have said many times before "it takes two to make a relationship and two to break one." If you think my writing is full of lies then you have a serious problem. Whilst I have always admitted that in some stories I may 'gild the lilly' for the sake of my art (now I am laughing) and others are perhaps two separate tales merged into one everything is basically true and the way things have happened. As regards the stories concerning our marriage failure then these are all totally the way I have seen things and are my perspective on the present situation. What is clear is how DIFFERENTLY you and I see life and therefore ending our marriage is the most sensible course of action for both of us, regardless of who may be the most at fault! Again I wish you well, I wish you a long and happy life and you are welcome to post your comments on here at any time. Regards, Kevin Dear Jin alias Mrs. Boss alias Rose,

I could, of course, have your comments delted, however, I choose not to. It is a free world, in the main, and everyone should have the chance to speak.

If you want to know why I left you then (a) you should have listened on the thousands of occassions I endeavoured to talk with you and (b) should know that you carry a heavy burden through your actions on what has transpired in our marriage.

I believe, and others will tell you better than I, that all through my writings I have endeavoured to portray you as an honest, hard working yet feisty person. I am not so insecure as to think the breakdown of our relationship is all your fault and as I have said many times before “it takes two to make a relationship and two to break one.”

If you think my writing is full of lies then you have a serious problem. Whilst I have always admitted that in some stories I may ‘gild the lilly’ for the sake of my art (now I am laughing) and others are perhaps two separate tales merged into one everything is basically true and the way things have happened. As regards the stories concerning our marriage failure then these are all totally the way I have seen things and are my perspective on the present situation.

What is clear is how DIFFERENTLY you and I see life and therefore ending our marriage is the most sensible course of action for both of us, regardless of who may be the most at fault!

Again I wish you well, I wish you a long and happy life and you are welcome to post your comments on here at any time.

Regards,
Kevin

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