And Now, a Songkran Flashback
Ah Songkran. My favourite time of the year…where to go beyond the confines of the hotel is a guarantee of a soaking with ice cold water, usually sprayed or thrown by drunken farangs. Of course it would be totally wrong to blame just the farangs for the mayhem this particular week brings to Pattaya. The Thais, bar girls in particular, are equally guilty of some appalling behaviour and a complete and utter inability to follow the basic and simple rules of this particular period.
Songkran used to be Thai New Year. A few years back New Year was changed by the government to 1-January inline with most of the outside world, although 13-April remains in the hearts of Thais. The festival was originally an opportunity for the younger members of a village to pay respect to their elders. They would cleanse and bathe them and then provide them with new clothes. Houses would be fully cleaned and all of the possessions no longer used or required would be thrown out. Today, however, the festival has become an excuse for drunkenness. Road accidents have increased dramatically, as does the number of people who are seriously injured or perish as a result. A one-day festival now extends to two or three days unless, of course, you happen to live in Pattaya where one endures an entire week of this mayhem.
The only relationship to the original rural-village Songkran-festival is the use of water, although I seriously doubt that 100 years ago high-pressure water-guns were used for the purposes of cleaning the elders. It also strikes me that a few villages back in the UK will be missing their idiot for the duration of this festival.
To be fair, this year’s Songkran, whilst still slightly less painful than having nails hammered through your hands, passed somewhat more quietly than my previous three experiences. Last year was particularly horrific and the rules were not bent, more broken into tiny pieces and thrown in the bin. At least this year hostilities abated around the correct time (6:00PM) and it was reasonably safe to go out after dark.
Just before the water throwing commenced, there was a dramatic change in the situation related to Mrs. Boss and myself. Having spent well over a month hurling abuse at one another, we appeared to have exhausted ourselves at around the same time. A conversation undertaken without any swearing at one another or my being accused of any heinous crimes led to a reconciliation of sorts. We agreed that fighting each other whilst endeavouring to sell or lease our assets was only going to see them disappear at fire-sale levels. It was therefore in our interests, and those of our children, that we work together to achieve the sales and then see how we both feel about our marriage. Despite the accusations and counter accusations of the last month or so, I still love my wife. Yes, I know she is a complete and utter pain in the backside but I have not exactly been blessed with Angel’s wings. Anyway, I moved back to the family house and we spent a week not quite walking on eggshells around one another, but pretty damn close to that. The fact it was only a week before I was back at the hotel was not the fault of any matrimonial dispute, more the result of having no bloody staff yet again.
As many of my readers will know, Songkran is the time of year when many Thais head back home to their towns and villages. They do not request time off for holiday or any such thing; they simply do not come to work and the first thing I know about this is a frantic phone call from the hotel advising that there is nobody available to clean the rooms or work on the reception desk. Our target staff number is ten, which provides us with cover for days off and ample receptionists and cleaners to do the jobs required. Normally we have six or seven staff and the only consolation is that we regularly fall below the staff salary budget set at the beginning of each year — although I find it difficult to see this as any consolation whatsoever. Today we have one cook, one room maid and one receptionist. We have adverts up for new staff and have contacted the local employment agency but the phone just isn’t ringing.
I seem to remember coming out here to Thailand over three years ago harbouring thoughts about semi-retirement. Well, in case you were wondering, these thoughts remain firmly anchored in the harbour of my mind!
